The summary given by Yun Xuan is concise and straight to the point. In his first paragraph he stated clearly the intent of the author and its basic idea of the article. This also helps the reader to understand the direction which Yun Xuan is taking to write further for his summary.
In his second paragraph, he elaborates more about the main idea of the article by citing examples from the article. For his examples, he mentions three distinguished diplomats and their high level of proficiencies in the art of diplomacy have influenced the author to the importance of a strong negotiator for the summit and the criteria to be one.
In my opinion, I think that this summary is short and very well organized. It is also very clear and boasts in text examples to support the idea of the article.
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
Monday, March 8, 2010
Posting #3-Comment on Yun Xuan's Summary of WA1 springboard reading (Copenhagen needs a strong negotiator)
There are three articles provided for the spring reading of Writing Assignment 1 and the writer chose the third article, ‘Copenhagen needs a strong lead negotiator’, as his reading reference. In his first paragraph of his posting, the writer kicked starts his posting by providing a clear and concise summary of the article he read.
The writer went on to summaries the examples which are found in the main body of the article. He outlined three successful negotiators who are mentioned in the article by describing how they affect the author positively and improved his skills for chairing big environmental meeting like Kyoto Protocol. The writer also provided very detailed summary on each negotiator on their outstanding skills which are essential for a strong lead negotiator.
In conclusion, the summary was very organized and clear to its point. By reading this summary, I can catch the gist of this article well enough and also facilitates my reading to this article.
Shi Tien(Posting #3)
e-Portfolio Posting 3: Comments on Peer Review
CHUA YUN XUAN POST3
As stated, the definition of 'consensus' was cited from article three in order to have a clear reference point.
In response to the feedback on the first written assignment one draft, an additional citation had been added to the final draft to increase the amount of references made from article three. As most of the ideas were not obtained directly from article three, it is difficult to extract supporting evidences or quotations. Thus, supporting of the arguments and viewpoints was done through a logical approach. It is also agreeable that some grammatical errors are present and sentence structures can be further improved.
In conclusion, clear feedbacks with direct references to the portion of written assignment one draft being responded on was given. These constructive comments will definitely aid in improving the written assignment one draft for the final version.
As stated, the definition of 'consensus' was cited from article three in order to have a clear reference point.
In response to the feedback on the first written assignment one draft, an additional citation had been added to the final draft to increase the amount of references made from article three. As most of the ideas were not obtained directly from article three, it is difficult to extract supporting evidences or quotations. Thus, supporting of the arguments and viewpoints was done through a logical approach. It is also agreeable that some grammatical errors are present and sentence structures can be further improved.
In conclusion, clear feedbacks with direct references to the portion of written assignment one draft being responded on was given. These constructive comments will definitely aid in improving the written assignment one draft for the final version.
e-portfolio posting 3- comments on Yun Xuan's e-portfolio posting 2
My thesis statement did clearly state that there two reasons to why we should climate change as one problem for both nature and people. Perhaps I can make it much clearer so that the reader will have no trouble identifying it. I do also agree that I can state the two reasons explicitly but I think that depends on a matter of choice and style of the writer. I personally see no harm in giving a clearer explanation and elaboration in the later part of my essay.
As for his comment on my first idea, I have no idea which two sentences which he is referring to that I should combine. Aside from that, I agree that I will have to give a more in depth elaboration on the 'basic materials' that I refer to in my essay. Doing so will help to substantiate my first point strongly.
In conclusion I do agree with him that I should have given more quotations and evidences from the article that my essay is based on. It is because they will boost my content in the essay and also to make my arguments more convincing.
As for his comment on my first idea, I have no idea which two sentences which he is referring to that I should combine. Aside from that, I agree that I will have to give a more in depth elaboration on the 'basic materials' that I refer to in my essay. Doing so will help to substantiate my first point strongly.
In conclusion I do agree with him that I should have given more quotations and evidences from the article that my essay is based on. It is because they will boost my content in the essay and also to make my arguments more convincing.
Sunday, March 7, 2010
e-portfolio posting 2- comments on Yun Xuan's WA 1 Draft
A clear thesis statement can be found in the second paragraph of the essay. The thesis statement provides a clear indication of the main content of the essay. A clear definition of the word 'consensus' is done in the first paragraph. This helps to set the boundary in which the content of the essay will be lingering in throughout.
Three main ideas thought out by the writer are presented clearly and systematically in the essay. The writer is also able to express his views and reasoning clearly in the main body of the essay. This makes reading and understanding the essay much less of a chore.
However further improvements can be made. Supporting evidences or quotations from the passage which the writer is referring to can be used in the essay. It will help to establish and back up his arguments and viewpoints strongly.
In general it is a well thought and structured essay, at least in my opinion. Grammatical errors are not too common and sentence structures have few flaws.
Three main ideas thought out by the writer are presented clearly and systematically in the essay. The writer is also able to express his views and reasoning clearly in the main body of the essay. This makes reading and understanding the essay much less of a chore.
However further improvements can be made. Supporting evidences or quotations from the passage which the writer is referring to can be used in the essay. It will help to establish and back up his arguments and viewpoints strongly.
In general it is a well thought and structured essay, at least in my opinion. Grammatical errors are not too common and sentence structures have few flaws.
e-Portfolio Posting 4: Summary of WA1 springboard reading (Copenhagen needs a strong negotiator)
CHUA YUN XUAN POST 4
The article by Raul Estrada-Oyuela gave a glimpse of the techniques and skills successful diplomats had displayed leading to a smooth and fruitful conclusion of international summits.
Three particular diplomats stood out for the writer, namely, Jean-Maurice Ripert, a distinguished French economist and former UN ambassador, Tommy Koh, former dean of the Faculty of Law at the National University of Singapore and former UN representative, and Angela Merkel, former Germany's environment minister. According to the writer, Ripert was an optimist in the most adverse of circumstances and had authority over certain countries as a result of his other designation. Ripert also seeked to understand other delegate's concerns and motivation through private consultations. As for Koh, he displayed initiatives in attending to impasses and utilised emotional appeals in order to achieve consensus. In the case of Merkel, she was labeled as extremely committed and versed in the uselessness of inflexibility and devoted to constructive compromise.
By studying them, the writer was able to integrate their tricks of diplomacy in the line of his work and produce fruitful outcomes in many situations.
The article by Raul Estrada-Oyuela gave a glimpse of the techniques and skills successful diplomats had displayed leading to a smooth and fruitful conclusion of international summits.
Three particular diplomats stood out for the writer, namely, Jean-Maurice Ripert, a distinguished French economist and former UN ambassador, Tommy Koh, former dean of the Faculty of Law at the National University of Singapore and former UN representative, and Angela Merkel, former Germany's environment minister. According to the writer, Ripert was an optimist in the most adverse of circumstances and had authority over certain countries as a result of his other designation. Ripert also seeked to understand other delegate's concerns and motivation through private consultations. As for Koh, he displayed initiatives in attending to impasses and utilised emotional appeals in order to achieve consensus. In the case of Merkel, she was labeled as extremely committed and versed in the uselessness of inflexibility and devoted to constructive compromise.
By studying them, the writer was able to integrate their tricks of diplomacy in the line of his work and produce fruitful outcomes in many situations.
Thursday, March 4, 2010
Posting #2- Comments on Fan Rui's writing assignment 1 draft1
In the writer’s first paragraph, the effects on global warming are given in form of statistic number and he also discussed on some of the causes of global warming which leads to his viewpoint of how seriously we should treat this problem. The introduction was well written and the development of his viewpoint was clear but descriptions on global warming can be cut down. Furthermore, the writer never answered to the question given and the thesis statement was not stated in his introduction paragraph. He should write his thesis statement to answer back to the question in his first paragraph.
The writer stated one similarity and one difference on what developing and developed countries should do. The writer failed to discuss on the similarity that he brought up, he should give more description on how similar the developed and developing countries make their effort in getting Earth from being warmer. On the other hand, the writer gave better write-up on the difference; there were more discussions on it. To better his essay, more concrete examples should be given to show how difference both groups of countries do in tackling the problem.
The second part of question was left out in the essay, the writer never discuss on the factors that both groups of countries should consider before signing the treaty. Factors like economic and political can be used to answer the second part of the question.
In his conclusion, the writer re-stated his viewpoint and said that the treaty needs to be signed quickly. He should also summarized his whole essay and answered back to the question to make his essay more complete.
Shi Tien(Posting #2)
The writer stated one similarity and one difference on what developing and developed countries should do. The writer failed to discuss on the similarity that he brought up, he should give more description on how similar the developed and developing countries make their effort in getting Earth from being warmer. On the other hand, the writer gave better write-up on the difference; there were more discussions on it. To better his essay, more concrete examples should be given to show how difference both groups of countries do in tackling the problem.
The second part of question was left out in the essay, the writer never discuss on the factors that both groups of countries should consider before signing the treaty. Factors like economic and political can be used to answer the second part of the question.
In his conclusion, the writer re-stated his viewpoint and said that the treaty needs to be signed quickly. He should also summarized his whole essay and answered back to the question to make his essay more complete.
Shi Tien(Posting #2)
Monday, February 22, 2010
e-Portfolio Posting 2: Comments on Desmond's WA1 Draft
CHUA YUN XUAN POST 2
With respect to the thesis statement, it should be stated clearly that the two reasons are offered on why an integrated approach should be taken in combating global warming, leading from the viewpoint that climate change is a threat to both nature and human. The thesis statement can also be fortified by stating the two reasons explicitly.
For the first idea, the first two sentences can be combined to show the link on why natural ecosystems should be part of our response to climate change. To support this idea, the example of a natural carbon storage system has been cited from the reading. Further discussions on the "basic materials" and carbon reduction can be included to substantiate the first idea. The second paragraph also stated the urgency in slowing climate change before the planet's capacity to accomodate it diminishes to the point of no return.
The second idea elaborated on the potential value of the natural ecosystems and ways in which it benefit and protect human. There is a clear flow on how climate change affecting the ecosystems will in turn affect human.
More compelling examples should be cited in paragraph two and three to support the strong concluding statement that "victory against global warming can be secured". By having a clearer thesis statement and topic sentences, coherence and the flow of ideas of the written assignment will be clearer. In general, the written assignment can be further refined to remove grammatical errors and to improve the sentence structures.
With respect to the thesis statement, it should be stated clearly that the two reasons are offered on why an integrated approach should be taken in combating global warming, leading from the viewpoint that climate change is a threat to both nature and human. The thesis statement can also be fortified by stating the two reasons explicitly.
For the first idea, the first two sentences can be combined to show the link on why natural ecosystems should be part of our response to climate change. To support this idea, the example of a natural carbon storage system has been cited from the reading. Further discussions on the "basic materials" and carbon reduction can be included to substantiate the first idea. The second paragraph also stated the urgency in slowing climate change before the planet's capacity to accomodate it diminishes to the point of no return.
The second idea elaborated on the potential value of the natural ecosystems and ways in which it benefit and protect human. There is a clear flow on how climate change affecting the ecosystems will in turn affect human.
More compelling examples should be cited in paragraph two and three to support the strong concluding statement that "victory against global warming can be secured". By having a clearer thesis statement and topic sentences, coherence and the flow of ideas of the written assignment will be clearer. In general, the written assignment can be further refined to remove grammatical errors and to improve the sentence structures.
Internal Groups 2
For e-postings 2 and 3, the groupings are as followed:
1) ShiTien with FanRui and ChenYan
2) YunXuan and Desmond
1) ShiTien with FanRui and ChenYan
2) YunXuan and Desmond
Monday, February 8, 2010
Comment on "Lecture on Climate change and modelling by Dr Liong Shie-Yui from Tropical Marine Science Institue"
CHUA YUN XUAN POST 1
During the EG1471 lecture on 5th February, two invited speakers Dr Liong Shie-Yui and Dr Benjamin K. Sovacool discussed the topics of monitoring climate change with climate models and the possible responses to climate change respectively. The first speakers's presentation was summarized by the writer.
The first part summarized the effects of climate change. The writer mentioned an important fact that it is the excessive emission of green house gases that leads to global warming which implies that an acceptable amount of the gases is necessary. This was supported by Dr Liong's comment that greenhouse gases are required to sustain life on the Earth. The writer also stated the effects of climate change which were supported by statistics provided by the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change.
The second part summarized the usage of Global Climate Models in tracking climate change and the alterations made for its application to smaller regions in the form of Regional Climate Models. Contrary to the writer's impression, the models provides a platform for monitoring climate change to a greater extent than as a response in tackling the climate issue.
The writer concluded his summary by stating the scale and urgency of climate change. Furthermore. he mentioned the ability of every individual in alleviating this pressing issue. This was elaborated by Dr Sovacool but due to the length constriant of the summary, the writer was unable to further discuss the issue.
To conclude, the writer provided a concise and structured summary on the presentation by Dr Liong.
During the EG1471 lecture on 5th February, two invited speakers Dr Liong Shie-Yui and Dr Benjamin K. Sovacool discussed the topics of monitoring climate change with climate models and the possible responses to climate change respectively. The first speakers's presentation was summarized by the writer.
The first part summarized the effects of climate change. The writer mentioned an important fact that it is the excessive emission of green house gases that leads to global warming which implies that an acceptable amount of the gases is necessary. This was supported by Dr Liong's comment that greenhouse gases are required to sustain life on the Earth. The writer also stated the effects of climate change which were supported by statistics provided by the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change.
The second part summarized the usage of Global Climate Models in tracking climate change and the alterations made for its application to smaller regions in the form of Regional Climate Models. Contrary to the writer's impression, the models provides a platform for monitoring climate change to a greater extent than as a response in tackling the climate issue.
The writer concluded his summary by stating the scale and urgency of climate change. Furthermore. he mentioned the ability of every individual in alleviating this pressing issue. This was elaborated by Dr Sovacool but due to the length constriant of the summary, the writer was unable to further discuss the issue.
To conclude, the writer provided a concise and structured summary on the presentation by Dr Liong.
Sunday, February 7, 2010
Posting #1-Lecture on Climate change and modelling by Dr Liong Shie-Yui from Tropical Marine Science Institue
On 4th Feb, I attended Dr Liong’s lecture on climate change and modelling. Two major discussions were made in his lecture namely the issues on global warming and the responses. In the first discussion, Dr Liong pointed out that the excessive emission of greenhouse gases by human activities caused global warming. With global warming, environmental problems such as rising sea level and increasing temperature have arisen. In addition, evidences from Intergovernmental Panel on climate change which also called IPCC were presented in graph form to support the discussion on the first issue.
In the second discussion, Dr Liong briefly talked about the responses that were made to tackle the drastic climate change. Global Climate Model (GCM) is created by IPCC to predict the climate change and study on the impacts that were made. However, GCM cannot be used in smaller regions like South East Asia. As such, smaller GCM which is called Region Climate Model is used instead which also served the same purposes as GCM. Similar to the first discussion, visual aids were given during the lecture to reinforce on the idea of modelling.
Finally, Global warming is a pressing issue faced by the whole world and I felt that everyone can play their parts in saving the environment starting from today!
Source: "Brief Introduction To Climate Change & Modelling" by Dr Liong Shie-Yui and Climate Team
Shi Tien(Posting #1)
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